Crazy Hot Cars

Summer time has arrived and that means "Bring on the Heat!" Not the heat that I get to pack around day-to-day, but the sizzling heat of 100 degree Fahrenheit (37.78 degrees Celsius for those of you not forced to acclimate to Fahrenheit). That kind of heat for weeks on end can drive a person crazy! Just look at those person's from Arizona, they are almost always crazy, especially during those blasted summer months (you know, you get anything past 110 degrees and it all feels the same, but at least its a dry heat!)

So these scorching temperatures can cause the vehicles we drive in to get hotter on the inside than it is outside. So, let's say you get to drive around a black car, you know, supped up! It looks hot! Not the temperature hot, but hot like "Oh baby, got to have one of those so I can get all the girls kind of hot, like the batmobile!" Yeah, it make look great and get the girls, but when your car has been sitting in the parking lot, oh for about eight hours, that's what most people work in a day! The inside of your car can become a flaming inferno!

So when you sit inside this unsuspected oven, first your poor tushy gets a torching, usually resulting in an upward collision of your head and the roof of your car; only adding to the pain! Once your bum has realized it's now ready to be the toasted buns of a whopper of a hamburger, then you can get the keys into the ignition. But you have to be careful not to nudge your finger on the signal stick, taking you back to the first time you ignored the warnings of your mother not to touch the hot burner on the stove! Once out of shock, you can gently get the air conditioning going. But that usually gives you a false sense of security of everything is going to be all right. Because once your shift into gear and reach for the round steering device your hands are once again sent into a blistering outcry and are usually followed by some choice words from your mouth. Usually something like, "Heavens to Mergatroid!" or "Great googally moogally!" or one that makes my mother blush, "Holy Freak!"

Do you think Batman ever experiences these dilemmas? That's probably why he wears those gloves and thick suit!

I have figured the solution to these blazing problems is everyone needs to adapt their car to time travel. Time travel makes a car cool! Not cool like pop your collar, roll your pants to show your Converse cool, but ice cold, freezer cool. Everyone knows once your car comes back from the future, it's a refrigerated bliss. So get traveling!

So remember, keep your cool and wear a black suit with black gloves, or travel in time. You are bound to break the crazy heat wave!